Week 1

19 Jan 2023

Whelp We went out there and did it! Week one is in the books and we’re solidly in the top 10, one ahead of the scourge, VSM. Unfortunately, a few behind the latest pro team, Wastes. I looked up the term wastes recently in my favorite thesaurus and I saw it was synonymous with “Friggin ringers, run with the scum”. But that’s okay cause we care about The Couch after all… I am sure Regneck and MTXC will show up on the podium with them at year’s end.

So, here’s how week one ended up – We had six running and it resulted in a mighty 19 points. Pretty freakin good by any measure leaving us in a five way tie for 5th place. Da Fooq? You say? Yup, our kiddies did it. We rock. Yes, we do. I know this and I wasn’t even there. Third place is at 22 points and screw those freaks in first. We don’t pay our racers, we’re the bad news wombats… Its certainly obvious that Joe Neal needs to rethink his book rates for ringers, the current crop are looking like the Denver Broncos, aka Donkeys, on any given Sunday versus the scum the wastes have brought to fore. Pretty soon that team, Wastes, will kick their captain and he will come a crawlin…

Well done all. Next week is fast to slow.

What a beautiful night for the gates before the ruts emerged from hibernation. All pictures courtesy of Mr Selfie.

mirage? you decide

Lets get on to the real meat and potatoes of week 1. MVW. Drum roll please…. I think we all, those who know, will not hesitate, to call out KY as MVW. Da Fooq Girl??? Wheezing and sneezing in the throes of delipidating yack butter coursing through her lungs she pulls out two victories. Way to go Miss Stud-ette. You can flex those biceps next week for us all to say – woo-baby, look at them guns! She’s hot.

Jack, if you’re still reading this far… come on with those match ups. Let’s get the finishes within tenths of a seconds. We know you’re a wizard at these things (except for the wastes who’ve dedicated slush funds your way)… I could do more armchair quarter backing here but I plan to race next week and I need to manage my hypocritical quota lest I must eat more than a full plate full of crow. I’ve learned much from our gov’ment and recently emergent ski teams.

Readyfur, way to get in the picture with them two Wombabes! Truly surprised their bodyguards didn’t bounce you out of there as recently seen at the umbrella bar.

But then we need to appreciate the LVW – Without a doubt it goes to Alpental management who has no friggin clue what Thursday night city league means to pizza and beer sales après ski. What a bunch of douche baguettes. My goodness, how friggin’ clueless can those clucks be to not review sales figure BC and AC – those nighttime numbers are down, not just because your stupid…. Well actually its totally because of the lack of business sense (stupid). The most loveable night of racers forsaken by the Stub. It does hurt fwiw. Wow! I’ll try to be gentle as possible as the season transpires but more likely you all are just going to leave a ton of Thursday night dollars on the table and I’m going to call you out about this. Brilliant. The good news is we can all sit in the parking lot anticipating Juliette’s amazing chili only to have Toddler’s stove fail… hahahahahahha. Dumbass.

Good gravy, what a beautiful night though.

Starry starry night

I don’t know about any of the rest of you who didn’t make it up, I am jealous to have missed this and you guys. The weather was good only ‘cause I was in Florida. I recommend a kick starter to keep me down there.

Xxxooo

-DonnyBrooke